Crap I Get On Grindr II

So there I was, (on a slow day at work) minding my own business trolling on FB – (Zuckerberg when will you roll out that poor substitute for a dislike button you call “Reaction buttons” into the UK?), when some guy liked a comment I made. He immediately sent me a friend request and in the spirit of ”Facebook friendship” and sheer boredom, I accepted his request.

To my utter surprise he immediately started a conversation on FB messenger (I suppose work was slow for him as well), but I didn’t respond immediately.  I checked his profile and saw he was friends with a good Jamaican friend of mine (yes I do have some bad Jamaican friends), named Peter. I asked Peter who the chap was and his response was far from complimentary.

Peter used choice words like “White dude who loves black dick”,”Patronising”, “Smarmy” , ”Ass-wipe” and finished off with “Bumbaclart”.

Like I said, It was slow at work and I had a few hours to kill before closing, so I decided to verify Peter’s colourful description of this guy and responded to the guy’s message and this is what transpired:

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Peter was on point with this guy’s description and then some. I really don’t care that he is a white, middle aged, rotund guy with bad teeth and flaky skin, fixated on Big Black Cock (BBC). In the pursuit of BBC he would sleep with any shape and manner of black guys and in most cases lose all manner of propriety and self-respect, like a crack addict after his fix. In other words  Any Black Will Do (ABWD).

From time to time, I come across white guys like him. They are prone to making racially offensive remarks, which are sadly overlooked by black guys in search of some form of socio-economic advancement. The thing is once people like this chap get away with this kind of behaviour and they think all other black guys are after the same thing and treat them with the same impudence.

I don’t think I have heard of how you gain working – let alone expert – knowledge of  the cultural behaviour of people from a certain country ,by getting on your knees and sucking them off. (Not even on your back;side or on all fours). Sadly I couldn’t sustain my indignation (or vomit) long enough to engage with this troglodyte, to begin to fathom why is his small mind works the way it does.  Still  I engaged, long enough for him to show his disdain for very people he claimed to like, especially those that don’t succumb to his unctuous advances.

But what I really want to know is how does a Nigerian writes differently from a “Native Brit”? And who are “Native Brits”? Are they exemplified by the Queen, who is actually German or the Prince of Wales who is Greek? (There goes my Knighthood).

Maybe they are the Bangladeshi community who own and run London Borough of Tower hamlets; or the wealthy middle-easterners what own most of Mayfair? Certainly not the Nigerians who own property and run businesses in Thamesmead aka Little Lagos?  Perhaps they can be found out in the countryside where they are threatened with extinction by the imminent influx of Syrian war refugees.

Someone please point me in the right direction.

PS: I should really rename this “Crap I Get On Social Media” shouldn’t I?

Twitter:Follow Back Or My Dick Falls Off

I am not sure when I will get the hang of social media, but I seem to have fallen foul again of another “rule”, this time it is not with Facebook. but with Twitter.

A few weeks ago, I got a standard Twitter notification that someone had started following my account. I looked at the new follower’s account and for no reason at all, other than he didn’t look hot on his profile picture and all his tweets consisted of copious amounts of dick & ass pics, I did not follow him back.

Twitter Follow me

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How To Make New Friends On Facebook….Or Not!!

I just got slapped by Facebook…AGAIN. I seem to fall foul of their ever changing rules which I don’t take time to read and I am yet to meet anyone who does either. It all suspiciously started not long after my blog post The fabulous life on Facebook. I wrote another blogpost that appeared on my timeline on facebook with a picture of a nice juicy phallus. The custodians of morality at Facebook Support Dashboard – FBSD (The acronym makes them sound like the secret service), removed the entry from my timeline because allegedly some self-righteous Mary Whitehouse wannabe found the picture offensive and reported it.

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Is this offensive?

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