HAPPY JUICE!!!

Just finished in the gym. It was an amazing workout. I am pumped.  I am on a high.  I think the high is caused by some happy enzyme that the body produces after a good workout.  Some can’t get enough of it so they go clubbing and get it from some (club) licensed purveyor (Drug dealer to you and I).

During the work out, the last track I listened to on my Ipod was “Just fine” by Mary J. Blige. It is still playing in my head. It is one of the few songs she sings, where she is not telling us about how life has picked her up, body slammed her into the ground, trampled all over, picked her up again, spun her in the air and slammed her into the ground again even harder and she comes out “Stronger With Every Tear” – and make-up and blonde weave still in place. (Actually when I think about it, the lyrics to the song are classic Mary!!!)  No one has suffered as much as MJB in this world, no one. Don’t know how she does it, but Kudos to her.

I am in the gym changing area in my towel and I catch a glimpse of moi in the mirror and I remember the part of the song where she goes:

 “So I like what I see, when I am looking at me

When I am walking past the mirror………”

(I know, I know, who would have thought; MJB (or me) a narcissist!) J

I put on my clothes. I get my stuff and head for the office. It is a bright sunny morning.  I switch on my Ipod and it is India “dot” Aire, coming through my earphones.  The song titled “I Choose” strikes a chord with me. Its  a feel good positive affirmation song.  I fall into step with the beat.  I am so happy; I am bopping my head and smiling. I am on the Strand walking towards Trafalgar Square. People are smiling back at me.  In my no expense spared music video production mind, I high-five bemused pedestrians, pointing at them and winking.  They point back at me smiling.

I even throw some moves with a couple of policemen. They don’t arrest me!! (It’s the video in MY mind; I have full artistic control). They smile, point and wink at me too. Those happy enzymes – I have to bottle and sell the stuff.

I moonwalk my way into Trafalgar Square to the front of the National gallery. I back flip into a camera shot of bemused Japanese tourists. I pose with them. I am the man.  I get into some simple choreograph routine, a few people get into step with me.  Like a mini flash mob, but not quite. People are smiling at me and pointing and clapping. I guess I am oozing so much happy enzymes, it is in the air.  There is an aura all around me; a glow.  I am now jumping and clicking my heals in the air as I leave the square.

I bop my way to St. James’ Square to the office. I give the portly building security guard a huge smile and a wink; she gives me the biggest grin ever. She reminds me of an Ex- Olympic shot-put thrower from the former Easter bloc. She hardly ever smiles.  Must be the happy enzymes thing from me; or maybe she got some last night (Ugh!!! I guess someone has to climb that. ) She points as well.

I take the stairs two at a time to the office on the 3rd floor. I am still buzzing. I still have the song blaring in my ears; I want to get to the end of the song. My fellow workers are smiling and pointing as well. Nice one. It is going be a happy day today.

I drop my bags under my desk and retrieve my work shoes from my desk drawer.  I sit down to take off my trainers and realise, to my horror that my fly is open!!!! And I had forgotten to wear my briefs in the gym… FUCK!!!!